Hello :)

ohcaptainmycaptain1918:

gwheeler:

My kind of comedy

Funny story about Bill Nye: so a friend of mine back in Ottawa was at the Science and Tech Museum, and she didn’t know it, but apparently Bill Nye was guest appearing there that day. So she is waiting for the elevator and this guy walks up beside her to wait for it, too. She turns and looks at him and immediately recognizes him. Completely forgetting that she’s a grown adult, she points at him and exclaims, “BILL NYE!” He glances at her and gives her this really fucking weird look, and she thinks, Oh fuck, I completely just embarrassed myself in front of Bill Nye and now he probably thinks I’m some creepy stalker or something. So the elevator doors open and he walks in, and she’s just too stunned and mortified to get in behind him; she just stands there, staring. He’s in the elevator, alone, with his back to her.

Just as the doors are closing, he whips around, points at her, and shouts, “SCIENCE!” and then the doors close. 

(via breadinthetoaster)

cedricdigory:

whenever i need a laugh i remember that if he hadn’t died james potter would have been dudley’s uncle. Picture James interacting with dudley. just do it, picture the scene

(via breadinthetoaster)

misha-dmitri-t-krushnic-collins:

pivotalwolf:

anorie:

lotrlockedwhovian:

baara:

the lady behind the counter asked how much whipped cream I wanted and I asked for a shit ton and then she came back with this

We now know the exact amount of shit ton, thank you for your contribution

#Excellent customer service

I used to work at Dunkin and I swear you would do things like this on peoples ridiculous requests and it either got a chuckle and a thank you… Or they bitched you out for being a smart ass.
Example: one time a dude asked for heavy cream so my cashier asked how white they wanted the coffee and they said make it purple. So I went to the decoration area and got flavorless food dye and made it purple. Never had a dude laugh harder in my life

this woukd have made me so happy

misha-dmitri-t-krushnic-collins:

pivotalwolf:

anorie:

lotrlockedwhovian:

baara:

the lady behind the counter asked how much whipped cream I wanted and I asked for a shit ton and then she came back with this

We now know the exact amount of shit ton, thank you for your contribution

I used to work at Dunkin and I swear you would do things like this on peoples ridiculous requests and it either got a chuckle and a thank you… Or they bitched you out for being a smart ass.

Example: one time a dude asked for heavy cream so my cashier asked how white they wanted the coffee and they said make it purple. So I went to the decoration area and got flavorless food dye and made it purple. Never had a dude laugh harder in my life

this woukd have made me so happy

(via cas-in-a-box)

freshcleanfit:

Here are some wintry animals reminding you to have a nice day and please take care of yourself because you are lovely!

(via cas-in-a-box)